Time Away

I have been away for virtually two weeks now at two different worship leading/songwriting conferences with some of the biggest names in worship and contemporary music. Feeling everything from inadequate to beyond wonderful all in the same time frame. It's been a time of up and down and side to side. Interesting how God can put people in front of you who can encourage and affirm you so much that you don't even realize your insides are changing until it's time to do something (leading worship for me) that is so second nature and you just "feel" differently! Yes, it's an amazing feeling.

I had been in Nashville for three days last week and spent time sitting under leaders like Carl Cartee, Laura Story, Clayton King, and others. I can truly tell you that I knew God was present, but I didn't feel much different. Nothing seemed overwhelmingly revolutionary or incredibly spiritual. For those of you who know me well, I'm fairly picky when it comes to music I listen to and I long for music (sound) that makes it easy for me to worship and enter into God's presence. The music was phenomenal and I had no trouble worshiping! BUT...I didn't notice that God was particularly speaking to me if you will. Interestingly, I got back to my home congregation in Winston-Salem on Sunday morning and we all just had an amazing time! I suddenly felt renewed and refreshed again! I felt like a good work had been done in me without me even being aware! The band was right on top of their game and I had a good week of resting my voice so...all of these things came together and made for a WONDERFUL morning of praise and worship to the only One who is worthy of our praise! GOOD STUFF!

As I left on Sunday morning from church knowing that I needed to pack for going to Asheville I was a very excited little worship leader! :) I had so enjoyed worshiping with my friends and team and knew that God had done a good work of refreshing my soul in Nashville. Completely unaware of what He had done, I stepped up on the platform and allowed Him to do whatever He wanted to do in that meeting of His people! I put aside the fact that we hadn't rehearsed that week. I put aside my fears of inadequacy. I laid to rest my pride as much as I could and I gave God permission to do whatever He wanted to do in our worship time. NOW...rest assured...I do this fairly regularly on Sunday mornings, but this one was different somehow. The team was very tight and the people were engaged and surrendered also.

What I'm trying to convey to you is this simple thing...God can do a mighty work in you in just one second and you don't even know it has happened! How cool is that? There was not one thing that I did in Nashville other than make a choice to focus on Him. I was pretty low when I left--pretty dry and weary. So I encourage you my friends to take a good long look at your insides. How are you really doing? Tell God how you are really doing! Spend some time just reflecting on how you REALLY are and then just tell Him about it and expect Him to refresh you! You don't have to strive...you don't have to try...you just have to be honest about how you are with Him and that you want to be different!

As a body of believers, we really need to stop trying to hide how we really are with people who care for us and want to help. AND...we need to be willing to close our mouths sometimes and let others tell us how they are and allow God to use US as a vessel to bring restoration to someone else!

Don't be afraid to tell God how you are. He knows already--yes--but it's sometimes nice to just get it out of your system and then allow Him in His timing to make a change and refresh you. You may just wake up one morning and say "WOW!...I'm feeling different!"

Love you all!
ashley